Hi Zoe, well done on posting the second draft - it's looking good. Some feedback - one thing is that there are a lot of close up's and minimal use of wide shots so it becomes quite claustrophobic. I also feel you need to intersperse short scenes of dialogue and really focus on the framing and composition as sometimes it's not clear what the eye should be focussing on in your shots. Have you thought of using coloured filters to add more visual style. These are just some ideas, well done for what you have produced :) Sir
Hi Zoe, well done on posting the second draft - it's looking good. Some feedback - one thing is that there are a lot of close up's and minimal use of wide shots so it becomes quite claustrophobic. I also feel you need to intersperse short scenes of dialogue and really focus on the framing and composition as sometimes it's not clear what the eye should be focussing on in your shots. Have you thought of using coloured filters to add more visual style. These are just some ideas, well done for what you have produced :) Sir
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